"Get a Clue" - Notes from Metro Leadership College Message

I was asked to speak the students of Metro Leadership College this week during their scheduled chapel.

They really know how to worship God!

Here are some of the notes from the end - I was punching it through pretty quick.

But to start off... here is my opening text... with my BIG idea - in ministry there are some things that you need to "get a clue" about.

Here is Jacob "getting a clue"....

16 When Jacob awoke from his sleep, he thought, "Surely the LORD is in this place, and I was not aware of it."
17 He was afraid and said, "How awesome is this place! This is none other than the house of God; this is the gate of heaven."
Genesis 28:16-17 (NIV)

One the things we need to get a clue about is the value of our primary relationships. Here is a cut n paste from some great resource from Perry Noble that I referred to.

My recommendation…ask your wife questions like…
§ What time would you like me home every night?
§ How many nights a week would you like for us to have dinner as a family?
§ How can I serve you and the kids once I get home?
§ What can I do for you when the kids go to bed to make you feel special?

Five Questions Husbands Should Ask Their Wives

#1 – What is the most romantic thing that I’ve ever done for you?
#2 – What is something fun we can do together?
#3 – What is one thing I can do for you this week that will relieve stress from your life?
#4 – How can I pray for you?
#5 – If you could change one thing about our marriage–what would it be?

Men…Ephesians 5:25 says we are to love our wives as Christ loves the church…
He never stops loving the church…
He never stops pursuing the church…
He always comes home for the church…
He never cheats on the church…
He provides for the church….
He never stops thinking about the church…
He takes the church seriously…

I am NOT the perfect husband…but more and more I am realizing that my marriage should NOT be about what I can get…but what I can give and how I can serve.
As men of God we should go ALL OUT to show the world how awesome Jesus is THROUGH loving our bride like He loves His!!!

Four Questions Wives Should Ask Their Husbands

#1 – Do You Feel Admired?
#2 – Do You Feel Respected?
#3 – Do You Feel Taken Care Of?
#4 – Is Our Sex Life Fulfilling To You?

In closing, I am thankful for my "get a clue" journey.

How about you?

Eight Gifts that Don't Cost a Cent! - Phil Evans

This simple checklist can help measure how you are nurturing your relationships.

The Gift of Listening
But you must really listen. Don't interrupt, don't daydream, don't plan your response. Just listen.
The Gift of Affection
Be generous with appropriate hugs, kisses, pats on the back and handholds. Let these small actions demonstrate the love you have for family and friends.

The Gift of Laughter
Clip cartoons. Share articles and funny stories. Your gift will say, "I love to laugh with you."

The Gift of Solitude
There are times when we want nothing better than to be left alone.Be sensitive to those times and give the gift of solitude to others.

The Gift of a Favour
Every day, go out of your way to do something kind. Good deeds are cool.

The Gift of a Written Note
It can be a simple "Thanks for your help" note, or a longer expression of your appreciation for that person being in your life. A brief handwritten note may be remembered for a lifetime.

The Gift of a Compliment
A simple and sincere, "You look great in red," "You did a super job," or "That was a wonderful meal" can make someone's day.

The Gift of a Cheerful Disposition
The easiest way to feel good is to extend a kind word to someone.

These are eight important ways we can contribute toward whole and healthy relationships.
They cost nothing, yet they may well be the most valuable gifts we can ever offer another person.

Relationships are VITAL!! - part 2

We need to value relationships and focus on personal renewal.

This is the starting point.
Everything starts in the heart.

Only changed people can change the world.

The foundation for everything is getting to know and love God, and serving His 5 purposes for your life.

But you were never meant to live your life in a vacuum. In fact, you cannot fulfill your life’s purposes by yourself.
You need other people’s help, and they need yours.
We’re better together.

We also need to desire relational renewal.

You must not only learn to love God with all your heart (personal renewal) you must learn to love your neighbour as yourself (relational renewal).

With conflict, divorce, violence, prejudice, abuse, division, and polarisation around us daily, it’s obvious we all need some lessons in building healthy relationships.

We need a revival of relationships and love that would change the cultural climate of or world.

It can start with you.

LET'S FOCUS ON RELATIONSHIPS and make a commitment to hear Bruce Sullivan on Saturday 10 October 9am.

Testimonials - Bruce Sullivan - Red Hot Relationships

Bruce, Bruce, Bruce... it's all about Bruce!


Really, it's all about quality relationships!


Here are what some people have said about Bruce after they listened to his presentation. These things are called "testimonials"........



You can check out the lists of satisfied customers over the last decade.... here goes!


http://www.brucesullivan.com.au/testimonials/testimonials2009.html

http://www.brucesullivan.com.au/testimonials/testimonials2008.html


Bruce is visiting Greater Springfield on Saturday AM 10 October for 2 sessions.

Tickets are $15 each for the 2 sessions.

Call 07 3381 9988 or email redhot@westlife.org.au.


Remember, great relationships just don't happen automatically!


You need to get intentional - so book a ticket today!

Relationships are VITAL!! - part 1

I wrote this post back in May 2009 about "The Relationship Principles of Jesus."

Here are some sections from that blog and some wise words from Rick Warren......

God tells us that our dominant life value is to love. Because God is love, and because he created you to love you, he wants you to learn to love too. Learning to love is the #1 lesson God intends for you to learn here on earth. Life is the school of love. Jesus once said that the entire Bible can be summed up in two commands: Love God with all your heart and love your neighbour as yourself.

Learning to love God and others is to be our highest goal, our greatest aim, our first priority, our deepest aspiration, our strongest ambition, our constant focus, our passionate intention, and the dominant life value of our lives. The more we learn to how to love authentically, the more like Jesus we become.

Selfishness must be replaced by unselfishness. Conceit must be replaced by compassion. Ego must be replaced with altruism. The focus on “me” must give way to “we.” It’s all about loving God and others.

But how?

In our fallen world where every heart and relationship is marred, broken, and damaged by sin, how can we apply the healing power of authentic love?

Learning to love unselfishly is not an easy task. It runs counter to our self-centred nature. Only Jesus can teach us the kind of love that heal, restores, and deepens relationships. And only Jesus can give us the power to love that way.

The Many Faces of Bruce Sullivan - Red Hot Relationships

Bruce Sullivan is a great guy. I have a friend who knows him too. He says great things about Bruce.

In addition, Bruce is one of the world’s leading authorities on relationships and personal motivation.


Here are some of the many faces of Bruce Sullivan.

Bruce is visiting Greater Springfield on Saturday AM 10 October for 2 sessions.

Tickets are $15 each for the 2 sessions.
Call 07 3381 9988 or email redhot@westlife.org.au.

Remember, great relationships just don't happen automatically!

You need to get intentional - so book a ticket today!


Check out more about Bruce at his website - http://www.brucesullivan.com.au/ - you'll be impressed!

Red Hot Relationships - Bruce Sullivan - Saturday AM 10 October

Good intentions are not enough!!

That's why I am really looking forward to this relationships and personal development opportunity.

Bruce is a world class speaker.

So Jill and I have booked our tickets and we will be there. We are getting intentional.

Because great relationships don't just happen by accident!

Here is what Bruce says....

"My goal is to provide you with a genuine understanding of how you can practically apply what I teach, quickly and easily to your own relationships."

Are You Getting the Point? - Dr Gary Chapman

Communication is easy until you have a disagreement.

So, how do we process conflicts without arguing? Most of us are far better at "making our point" than in "getting the point" of the other person.

Listening has to do with trying to look at the world through the other person's eyes. It's not that difficult if you try. Once you can truthfully say, "I think I understand what you are saying, and it makes sense." Then you can say, "Let me tell you how I'm thinking, and see if it makes sense to you."

Two people who listen long enough to affirm each other can then find a win-win solution.

Arguments reveal the heart. Almost always arguments grow out of unmet emotional needs. One wife said, "Little things like getting the old newspapers out to the garage for recycling is not a big deal to him, but it is to me because I hate clutter. It's kind of a visual thing." What is she saying? One of her emotional needs is to have order in the house. Clutter is emotionally upsetting to her.

The wise husband and wife will look for the emotional need behind the argument.
Why is my spouse so upset over what seems trivial to me? The answer to that question will help you understand your spouse. Meeting emotional needs for each other is one way to create a positive climate for communication.

"The Relationship Principles of Jesus" - Pastor Tom Holladay.

The following is Rick Warren's Introduction to the new book "The Relationship Principles of Jesus" written by Saddleback Teaching Pastor Tom Holladay.

If I asked you what your #1 goal in life is, what would be your answer?
Happiness? Success? Wealth? Comfort? Fame? To have fun? To be respected?
Your answer would reveal your dominant life value. Everyone has a dominant life value whether they realise it or not. You have one. It’s what you unconsciously base your decisions on.

If your dominant life value is having fun, when choosing between two events, you’ll naturally choose the one that’s more fun. If your dominant life value is comfort, you’ll tend to choose what’s most comfortable for you. If its safety, you’ll choose the least risky alternative. If it’s being appreciated, you do what gets you the most recognition.

God tells us that our dominant life value is to love. Because God is love, and because he created you to love you, he wants you to learn to love too. Learning to love is the #1 lesson God intends for you to learn here on earth. Life is the school of love. Jesus once said that the entire Bible can be summed up in two commands: Love God with all your heart and love your neighbour as yourself.

In fact, every one of the New Testament writers taught that learning to love God and loving each other is the most important lesson God expects us to learn. Paul wrote “Let love be your highest goal” John wrote, “We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers. Anyone who does not love remains in death.” James wrote, “If you really keep the royal law found in Scripture, "Love your neighbour as yourself," you are doing right.” Peter wrote “Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.”

Learning to love God and others is to be our highest goal, our greatest aim, our first priority, our deepest aspiration, our strongest ambition, our constant focus, our passionate intention, and the dominant life value of our lives. The more we learn to how to love authentically, the more like Jesus we become.

This book is written by someone who has modelled genuine love to others for his entire adult life. For over 35 years I’ve closely watched how Tom Holladay lives and leads by showing Christ-like love to everyone and can say that I feel very fortunate that he married my sister. With his incredible grasp of both the Scriptures and human nature Tom is eminently qualified to teach and write on this profound theme. For nearly 20 years, as a teaching pastor of Saddleback Church, tens of thousands of Saddleback members have been blessed by Tom’s insights into relationships. And hundreds of thousands of pastors have been trained by Tom as he and I have travelled the world together. This man has much to say and you’ll be blessed if you listen to him!

The opening sentence of The Purpose Driven Life is “It’s not about you.” This book, The Relationship Principles of Jesus, is a natural extension of that concept. Selfishness must be replaced by unselfishness. Conceit must be replaced by compassion. Ego must be replaced with altruism. The focus on “me” must give way to “we.” It’s all about loving God and others.
But how? In our fallen world where every heart and relationship is marred, broken, and damaged by sin, how can we apply the healing power of authentic love? This book points the way.

Learning to love unselfishly is not an easy task. It runs counter to our self-centred nature. Only Jesus can teach us the kind of love that heal, restores, and deepens relationships. And only Jesus can give us the power to love that way.

The Relationship Principles of Jesus deals with the second of Five Renewals I deeply believe are needed in our culture and world. The first book, The Purpose Driven Life, focused on personal renewal. This is the starting point. Everything starts in the heart. Only changed people can change the world. The foundation for everything is getting to know and love God, and serving his five purposes for your life.

But you were never meant to live your life in a vacuum. In fact, you cannot fulfill your life’s purposes by yourself. You need other people’s help, and they need yours. We’re better together. This second kind of renewal, relational renewal, is what this book is all about. You must not only learn to love God with all your heart (personal renewal) you must learn to love your neighbour as yourself (relational renewal).

With conflict, divorce, violence, prejudice, abuse, division, and polarisation around us daily, it’s obvious we all need some lessons in building healthy relationships. This is my dream: If every group and church that participated in 40 Days of Purpose worldwide would also study this book as a part of 40 Days of Love, it could bring about a revival of love that would change the cultural climate of or world. It can start with you.
Rick Warren